woensdag 11 juli 2018

So, the Universe and I were sitting in the back garden of my house the other day. The sun was out and we were both bored.

So, the Universe and I were sitting in the back garden of my house the other day. The sun was out and we were both bored.
“What shall we do? I asked the Universe.
“I don’t know man, good question. What do you wanna do?”
“I don’t know. That's why I asked you.” I replied.
“Shall we make some prank phone calls?” said the Universe.
“I don’t even think I own a phone book anymore.” I said.
“Shall we liberate all the animals from the petting zoo?
“Whose going to clean up all the llama shit then?”
“Uhm, ok…shall we brainstorm an idea to help defeat Trump in 2020?”
“Good luck with that.” I said.
“Now you’re just being a whole bunch of no fun.” said the Universe.
“Sorry,” I said, “Let’s try to think positive.”
“Yes, let’s think positive. So what do you wanna do today?” the Universe asked.
“How about we devise a way to help defeat Trump in 2020.” I said.
“We’re all just better off letting him defeat himself.” replied the Universe.
“Uh, ok…then how about we liberate the animals from the petting zoo?”
“Dude, you know how much of a pain in the ass it is to get llama shit off of your shoes?”
“Ok, how about we make some prank phone calls then?” I said.
“What’s the fun in making prank calls when everyone's got caller ID nowadays?”
“So, then what are we going to do today then?” I asked the Universe.
“I am all out of ideas.” said the Universe.
“How can the Universe be out of ideas? I thought you, the Universe was ever expanding?”
“The Universe is like a snowman in summer.” proclaimed the Universe.
“Huh?” I said, “What the hell does that mean?”
“I am not sure,” said the Universe, “I just liked the way it sounded in my head.”
“Well you said it out loud too and now it is out there and I still don’t understand it.” I said.
“Don’t worry man, let it go” replied the Universe, “I think it’s just the mescaline starting to settle in.”
“And the sky is still blue like an illusion.” I said.
“Yeah man, the sky is still blue like an illusion,” repeated the Universe. “I guess the mescaline is starting to affect you too?”
“When did we take mescaline?” I asked the Universe.
The Universe smiled at me and I saw in its eyes an oppurtunity for awakening. All questions of boredom became null and void.
“Let’s just go for a walk.” I said.
“Now, was that such a difficult idea to come up within the first place?”

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